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• Canister X Movie Review #132: The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007)

  Posted on September 12, 2015 1:27 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007)

  

  The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007)
  Written by Wes Craven and Jonathan Craven
  Directed by Martin Weisz
  Runtime 89 min.
  4 out of 5

  A group of rookie soldiers head out to top secret government area, Sector 16, to bring supplies to a bunch of scientists who are out in the rocky desert conducting tests. When the soldiers arrive at the camp, the scientists are missing. Soon, they discover the surrounding hills are infested with mutant cannibal killers bent on slaughtering anyone that comes their way.

  Simple story, but enough of a premise for me to enjoy this The Hills Have Eyes sequel. Sure, it wasn’t as good as the first one, but we all knew the sequel was coming given this flick’s predecessor’s ending.

  While the mutants in the first one were just plain disturbing to look at, in this one they were downright ugly. Warts, misshaped body parts, skewed eyes, drool, bad teeth—they really upped the gross factor with the makeup and prosthetics this time.

  The army-based cast of characters are stereotypical, sure, but in these types of movies—I’d almost say a “post-apocalyptic” one albeit a localized apocalypse—army characters fill a need that regular Joe Blows don’t. After all, it’s always the army that’s supposed to come to the frontlines in extreme circumstances. However—and granted I’m not a military man myself—I did find the army folks lacking in the areas of intelligence and overall combat skill. Yes, they weren’t seasoned vets, but at the same time, you’d think they’d be better trained to handle formidable foes hand-to-hand if needed be.

  The dark tunnels and caverns in this flick added a level of spookiness that regular rooms or basements can’t. No one likes being trapped in the dark even if it’s the dark of your own living room. Get trapped in a foreign location not made of wood and drywall and you got a rough terrain for anyone to endure.

  Will they make a third one? I don’t know as it’s been awhile since this installment, however this fan of the franchise wouldn’t mind another sequel, though I’d be more thrilled if it was in the vein of the first rather than the second.

  All in all, still an enjoyable late-night flick, especially if you’re into mutant terror.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged Jonathan Craven Martin Weisz mutant cannibal killers mutant terror mutants scientists sequel soldiers The Hills Have Eyes 2 Wes Craven

• A Note on Facebook Pages

  Posted on September 11, 2015 11:53 am by A.P. Fuchs

  Presently I’m running two Facebook pages, one a fan page, the other a personal page. They each have their purpose and there is minimal overlap of content.

  The fan page – presently, it’s straight-up broadcast. This is where I share only writing/book-related items pertaining to my career.

  The personal page – this gives you the broadcasted items plus me making comments about whatever and being an idiot on a daily basis. I also interact the most here.

  Depending on your cup of java, either of the above might work for you, or even both if you want to show extra support.

  Hook up:

  Fan page
  Personal page

  See you there.

  Thanks.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Promo Items 📎and tagged book broadcast Facebook fan page personal page Writing

• Canister X Movie Review #131: The Hills Have Eyes (2006)

  Posted on September 11, 2015 10:05 am by A.P. Fuchs

  The Hills Have Eyes (2006)

  

  The Hills Have Eyes (2006)
  Written by Alexandre Aja and Grégory Levasseur
  Directed by Alexandre Aja
  Runtime 107 min.
  4 out of 5

  The story is simple: a family’s off on a holiday and have taken a short cut through the desert to get there. In order to make the trip, they pull up to a lone gas station in the middle of nowhere to top up the tank. Problem is, the gas attendant is in on a little secret and points them to a “short cut” that’s supposed to save them a couple hours. Instead, this short cut leads the family on the fast track to death as a pack of bloodthirsty mutants hunt the family as their next meal.

  No, really, that’s the story. But you know what? I love it. Simple horror, straight and to the point. Here’s the good guys, here’s the bad guys, here’s the setting. Let’s see what happens. It works for me and it works for The Hills Have Eyes no problem. Unfortunately, I didn’t see the 1977 original so I can’t compare the two, but what I can tell you is the idea, as presented in the movie, of human-mutants caused by nuclear testing’s radioactivity was done well, especially since the mutations aren’t over the top but very believable (i.e. a guy with a big head; a little girl with a lopsided face; even the grossest of the bunch just seemed to have a few tumors the size of pool balls bulging under his skin).

  This movie started off with a quick action scene, then the credits rolled, and the main story got under way. Since we as the viewers knew this family was in jeopardy almost right from the start, the slow build-up leading to the explosion of danger and gore was well worth the wait. Actually, I’m glad there was a long lead up before things went crazy. Made you care and relate to the family first before things started happening to them. Made it all the more painful when they got killed.

  The one part that really got me jumping was the involvement of the baby who, it seemed, was around six months old. Being a parent, the thought of your child getting kidnapped is just terrifying. Add getting kidnapped by cannibal mutants to that and it really makes for sensitive watching. Every scene where I thought maybe something would happen to the kid, I was, like, “No, not that baby!” (What? Horror fans can’t be sensitive?)

  The 180-degree character development of our hero, Doug Bukowski (Aaron Stanford) , was impressive especially since I really didn’t like him at all in the beginning, which was the point, and which was a success on the part of the filmmakers. Truly awesome.

  The Hills Have Eyes was a fun horror movie that pleased this roadside horror fan to the nines. Going to be renting the sequel. Definitely.

  Go see this.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged Aaron Stanford Alexandre Aja Grégory Levasseur mutants The Hills Have Eyes

• Canister X Movie Review #130: Doghouse (2009)

  Posted on September 10, 2015 4:15 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  Doghouse (2009)

  

  Doghouse (2009)
  Written by Dan Schaffer
  Directed by Jake West
  Runtime 89 min.
  4.5 out of 5

  A group of friends head out to the town of Moodley for a “boys only” weekend in an attempt to get away from their significant others back home and also rediscover themselves. All is well and good. Drinks are had before they left, a fun roadtrip, jokes, ribbing—but everything changes when they find the town of Moodley deserted.

  Soon it is discovered the only folks left are the women—and they have a deadly appetite for human flesh. Grotesque female monsters send the boys on the run and into a battle for survival in this throwback to classic horror.

  And that’s what really sums up this flick for me: classic horror. Prosthetic monsters, excellent makeup, and good old-fashioned blood and guts, along with a storyline that carried with it a sense of depth ala Shaun of the Dead.

  This is one of those flicks that are worth watching again because the writing is quite good, with each line feeding off the other—whether subtly or overtly—references to earlier lines/comments, objects and people. Extremely well done.

  Not only that, but the cast also had great chemistry and created a buddy-horror flick that reminded me a lot of hanging out with my friends back in the glory days of all-night partying and crude jokes (minus the cannibalistic women, of course).

  The ’80s-style soundtrack gave this flick an eerie mood that reminded me of the old Nightmare on Elm Street stuff, really setting the tone.

  Really happy with this film, and would recommend it in a hot minute.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged buddy-horror classic horror. blood and guts Dan Schaffer Doghouse Jake West monsters

• Canister X Movie Review #129: In Hell (2003)

  Posted on September 9, 2015 3:48 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  In Hell (2003)

  

  In Hell (2003)
  Written by Eric James Virgets and Jorge Alvarez
  Directed by Ringo Lam
  Runtime 98 min.
  4 out of 5

  Kyle’s (Jean Claude Van Damme) wife is murdered and, though the culprit is caught, when the case goes to trial, there’s not enough evidence to convict him. Taking matters into his own hands, Kyle kills the man himself right after and is sentenced to life in Krava prison in Russia. Once there, Kyle discovers the crooked warden hosts fighting battles on the grounds and bets with other wardens who bring fighters in from other prisons.

  At first content to fight, Kyle makes a name for himself as someone not be messed with, but when a close friend is killed, he decides to lower his hands and fight no longer. Following his example, the other inmates no longer fight as well, and the entire order of the prison is challenged.

  But one of the inmates has a secret and in order for the prison to be brought down once and for all, Kyle must step into the ring one last time.

  I got to say I was really impressed with this. This was the first Van Damme prison movie I’ve seen since Death Warrant and, frankly, had a blast watching it. This flick has a strong story and isn’t your usual fair of Van Damme merely fighting and winning the “big one” at the end. Instead, it’s the story of one man’s journey to do what’s right inside prison walls and learning when it’s time to walk away.

  As for the fighting, though, yeah, much more realistic than other JCVD flicks. Lots more wrestling, arm holds, close toe-to-toe stuff, and, dare I say, didn’t have a single patented Van Damme 360-kick in it. The matches were also pretty much 50-50 in terms of blows exchanged, instead of Van Damme winning all the fights until the final guy, then gets his butt beat for ten minutes, before having a big comeback where he dominates and wins (with that 360-kick). The fights in this flick were more blow-for-blow, with one guy winning after the other guy gets knocked out.

  I really enjoyed this, so if you’re in a JCVD mood but also want a good story that sucks you in from the start, In Hell is the way to go.

  Recommended.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged Eric James Virgets fighting fights In Hell Jean Claude Van Damme Jorge Alvarez prison movie Ringo Lam

• Up and Running on Instagram

  Posted on September 8, 2015 5:14 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  After a bit of thought, I decided to open an Instagram account, which you can access here or via the camera icon on the right.

  Photography’s an interesting medium and one that, if used correctly, is fun to follow and learn from.

  Currently, my plan for my feed will consist of writing-related items, book stuff, comic stuff and perhaps some pop culture items.

  Already got one pic up as a test.

  Hope you follow along.

  Cheers.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Promo Items 📎and tagged book stuff camera comic stuff Instagram photography pic pop culture Writing

• Canister X Movie Review #128: 2012 (2009)

  Posted on September 8, 2015 5:00 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  2012

  

  2012
  Written by Roland Emmerich and Harald Kloser
  Directed by Roland Emmerich
  Runtime 158 min.
  4.5 out of 5

  The Mayans warned us thousands of years ago that 2012 would mark the end of the world as we know it.

  They were right.

  We just didn’t listen.

  Jackson Curtis (John Cusack), separated dad and small-time novelist, goes for the ride of his life when him and his family are caught up in the end of the world in the year 2012.

  Dr. Satnam Tsurutani (Jimi Mistry) stumbled onto the truth of what was really happening to the Earth back in 2009. He showed his friend and colleague Adrian Helmsley (Chiwetel Ejiofor), who in turn told Carl Anheuser (Oliver Platt), who in turn told the President (Danny Glover). Plans were made. Research done. Even some advancements were made . . . but all for naught.

  Catching wind from lunatic conspiracy theorist and radio broadcaster Charlie Frost (Woody Harrelson) that all the rich folks in the world plus those who would create the perfect gene pool were to be held up in a series of arks ’til the disasters ran their course, Jackson Curtis takes his family on an adventure to head them off and get onboard themselves.

  Disaster after gigantic natural disaster ensues and the Curtis family narrowly escapes with their lives, that is, until they find the arks somewhere in China and learn that the powers that be have other plans in mind for humanity’s survival.

  If there was any one word that I would use to describe this film, it would be “big.” Actually, not just “big,” but “BIG!!!!” HUGE! COLLASSAL! GIGANTIC and UTTERLY MASSIVE!

  At the time of this review, this movie is still in the theatre. It definitely is a must-see-at-the-theatre movie. You need that big screen and surround sound to do it justice.

  Everything is big scale in this one: the collapsing buildings, the giant earthquakes, the mountains crumbling, land folding over itself and falling a zillion feet to the Earth’s core, the tsunamis, the dust clouds—the list is endless, and everything is done HUGE. The whole time I was just sitting there with my mouth hanging open going, “Whoa . . . whoa . . .”

  Sure, there are a few convenient plot devices and a few impossible odds are overcome, but I went into this thing expecting a popcorn blockbuster with over-the-top special effects and that is exactly what I got. I left the theatre with a huge smile on my face.

  Though I personally don’t buy into the world ending in 2012, this is still one worth seeing.

  Go see it. You’ll love it. Good times for all.

  Love end-of-the-world stuff? Then BLOOD OF THE DEAD might be up your alley!

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged 2012 blockbuster Chiwetel Ejiofor conspiracy theorist Danny Glover earthquakes end of the world Jimi Mistry John Cusack Mayans Oliver Platt Roland Emmerich Woody Harrelson

• Canister X Movie Review #127: Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

  Posted on September 6, 2015 8:24 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

  

  Flight of the Living Dead (2007)
  Written by Sidney Iwanter, Mark Onspaugh and Scott Thomas
  Directed by Scott Thomas
  Runtime 94 min.
  4 out of 5

  A team of scientists creates a virus that kills the victim then regenerates the body. The idea: sell it as a biological weapon. The plan: one of the scientists is infected so is transported via plane in a special container under armed guard. Not that they think the scientist within is a threat, just that they don’t want anyone stealing the container.

  The plane encounters a severe thunderstorm and is rocked all over the place. Sure enough, the container is no longer secure and the person within is brought back to life. First goes the guard . . . then goes everyone else.

  Also on board—in coach—is a cop named Truman Burrows (David Chisum) and a criminal, Frank (Kevin J. O’Connor), being transported for trial. Soon these two must set aside their differences if they are to survive this doomed flight.

  Outbreak on a plane? You bet.

  Big trouble? You better believe it.

  The premise for this movie is just plain cool: zombies on a plane (sounds familiar, don’t it?). Good stuff. My question going into this was: okay, you got a plane full of zombies, but only so much room. How can you fill a whole movie without people getting slaughtered inside of fifteen minutes? Sure enough, the writers thought of that and managed to at first slowly let the zombies rise then, due to the large plane and various compartments therein, give our main band of heroes some room to run around and not get eaten.

  The zombies were scary, especially their eyes. Really good makeup. There was plenty of action and enough blood and guts to make any horror fan happy.

  The only thing I thought was kind of weak was the pilot’s insistence on not setting the plane down once the undead outbreak occurred. Can’t you land on more than just a long stretch of road? How about a field? Even a water landing? Better to take a chance with those than watch your passengers get eaten.

  This is one of those B-movies that make you happy you love B-movies, you know? There’s a sense of B-horror pride with this one. Hard to place it, but it’s there. More than once I was going, “Oh man, this is so good!” Maybe it’s the acting. Maybe it’s the grade of the film. Maybe the effects. I don’t know . . . but it’s good.

  Fun flick. Check it out.

  I’m glad I added Flight of the Living Dead to my collection.

  And on a personal note, I had the privilege of publishing one of the co-writers of this movie, Mark Onspaugh, in my science-gone-wrong zombie anthology, Dead Science. His story is called “The Decay of Unknown Particles.” Cool.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged B-horror B-movies David Chisum Flight of the Living Dead Kevin J. O'Connor Mark Onspaugh outbreak Scott Thomas Sidney Iwanter undead zombies

• Canister X Movie Review #126: Ninja Assassin (2009)

  Posted on September 4, 2015 2:21 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  

  Ninja Assassin (2009)
  Written by Matthew Sand and J. Michael Straczynski
  Directed by James McTeigue
  Runtime 99 min.
  5 out of 5

  Raizo (played by Rain), an orphan, was taken to a secret ninja training camp run by the Ozunu Clan when he was just a boy. After years of harsh, even deadly, training, Raizo was brought up to be the greatest ninja of the clan, even one who would one day take it over as leader.

  While a child and through his growing-up years, he befriends Kiriko (Anna Sawai) and she is just as strong-willed as he is except where he lacks feeling, she has a heart and doesn’t agree with all the clan teaches. When Kiriko tries to escape, Raizo sees what it truly means to be a member of the Ozunu Clan and from then on follows his own path to take the clan down.

  Enlisting the help of a Europol agent, Mika Coretti (Naomie Harris), together they try and bring the clan to justice. However, not is all what it seems and the Ozunu Clan has plans of their own. Led by Raizo’s brother, Takeshi (Rick Yune), the two are hunted, and only after the swords stop slicing and the blood cools will a victor be decided.

  This movie is hardcore, man. There’s really no other word for it. Total and utter blood-soaked craziness that reminded me of Mortal Kombat (the game). I was just waiting for a low, ominous voice to say “Fatality.” Awesome.

  The kung fu in this flick is intense, especially the swordplay. Those bladed fights were among some of the best I’ve seen, right up there with the stuff in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Rain looked brilliant, his body and demeanor as hard as steel. More than once was I reminded of Bruce Lee in Enter the Dragon with the way he moved. The flashback sequences also worked well and really added to Raizo’s back story and firmly cemented us in his psyche so we know why he fights the way he does, why he’s on the path he’s on, and what motivates him as a ninja. Well done.

  What I especially liked in this movie was the ninjas’ mystique and their power, namely the part about them being one with the shadows and the paranoia those being hunted had with the dark. The idea of always keeping the lights on and bright was a great way to play this up. The ninja-morphing with the shadows was also cool, giving the impression that these guys, after all that training, have become something more than human.

  This is just one crazy bloodbath of a movie. Non-stop action. Amazing sword battles. Cool enough story to string one fight scene to the next.

  Ninja Assassin is the definition of a martial arts flick.

  Yeah, go check it out. Definitely.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged action Anna Sawai Bruce Lee Crouching Tiger Enter the Dragon Hidden Dragon J. Michael Straczynski James McTeigue martial arts Matthew Sand Mortal Kombat Naomie Harris Ninja Assassin ninjas Ozunu Clan Rain Rick Yune swords

• Canister X Movie Review #125: JCVD (2008)

  Posted on September 3, 2015 1:17 pm by A.P. Fuchs

  JCVD (2008)

  

  JCVD (2008)
  Written by Mabrouk El Mechri, Frédéric Benudis and Christophe Turpin
  Directed by Mabrouk El Mechri
  Runtime 97 min.
  4.5 out of 5

  Jean-Claude Van Damme—international movie star.

  Jean-Claude Van Damme—the Muscles from Brussels.

  Jean-Claude Van Damme—loved by millions

  Jean-Claude Van Damme—criminal?

  It’s a post office hostage situation and Van Damme is suspected to be the guy running the show. He talks to the cops, tells them what he wants, is alone inside with the hostages—he’s got guilty written all over him.

  Except not all is what it seems and Van Damme—hero to all—is having the worst day of his life. Not only did he lose custody of his daughter, he’s broke, has no new movie on the horizon and now he’s getting framed taking a post office with a built-in bank hostage.

  I just finished watching this and I’m still soaking it in. I’ve seen most of Van Damme’s movies and JCVD is nothing like any of them. This isn’t an action movie despite it starting that way. This is a drama. Big time, and Van Damme proves here he is way more than just muscles, high kicks, and guns. This Van Damme is raw, brutally honest, caring and just downright human. No eight-foot-tall-and-bullet-proof karate guy here. This is the story about Van Damme the man (he goes by his own name in the movie), one with heart, potent emotion and a performance that should have been nominated for an Oscar. Seriously.

  Van Damme’s not listed in the movie’s writing credits, but there’s a point in the movie where he talks to the camera about life, Hollywood, the ups and downs and simply apologizes for the mistakes he’s made in real life to those he knows and to those, like us, he doesn’t. Just phenomenal.

  My only little thing was the story seemed to move slowly in parts, but, hey, that could just be me.

  And the ending . . . man, it was just perfect. I really liked how they presented it, especially the climatic scene between Van Damme and the bad guys. To go any other way would have completely ruined the movie, but this was handled nicely. Good on them.

  The sepia coloring used throughout the film added a wonderful grittiness to it, enhancing the drama and its foreign and rustic atmosphere.

  This is a Van Damme movie you’ve never seen before. This is a Van Damme you’ve never seen before.

  You need to see this.

  
  

  📂This entry was posted in Movie Reviews 📎and tagged Christophe Turpin Frédéric Benudis high kicks Hollywood JCVD Jean Claude Van Damme karate Mabrouk El Mechri Muscles from Brussels